My Biggest What-If
by Doverstar
Summary: From Jack Frost's POV, he tells you about a girl from his past, before he was the legend, and how he wishes things could have gone differently between them, if he hadn't become what he now is: Guardian of Fun, King of Cool. (Warning, SPOILERS for the movie!) Includes scenes from Jack's past from the film.


**(AUTHOR'S ALERT: Spoilers for the Rise of the Guardians movie ahead! I saw it the night it was released, and it was fantastic, and I am so in love with Jack Frost, but his backstory was one of my favorite parts. And yes, it is revealed in the movie. And so I had to write an OC, a girl Jack might have ended up with had he not become Jack Frost. So if you don't want spoilers for Jack's backstory, because some of those scenes are in this one-shot, don't read this. I mean it. It's much cuter in the movie anyway! But if you have seen it, read on all you like! But bear in mind I've only seen it once, and I can't remember the EXACT dialogue from the moment Jack...well, you know. The moment before he becomes Jack Frost. So bear with me there. I wrote what I remembered and ad-libbed the rest. Enjoy! ~Doverstar)**

* * *

My name is Jack Frost. How do I know that? The moon told me so. But for a while, that was all he ever told me. By this time, I know who I am. Or was.

See, right _now_ I'm a Guardian, but before that, I was just a regular guy.

But that was a while ago. 300 years ago, actually.

I looked pretty different too. Brown hair, brown eyes, old-timey clothes. Right now all my features are in kind of a deep-freeze.

Anyway, that's not what I'm here to tell you about. I'm here to tell you about a certain somebody I remember from my past. I keep getting flashbacks of her, which is fine and all, but those are events that happened _300 years ago_.

Get what I mean?

Yeah. I can't help wondering what could have happened between us.

Better start from the beginning.

When I was a kid, I didn't have a ton of friends. I mean, I had a lot in the terms my village would use, but we were only a strict handful; maybe 200, 250 people. Whatever. Not a ton.

As a young boy, I was kind of a troublemaker. Class clown, always the prankster, just looking for a little fun. My best friend was a girl named Iris, because no matter how hard you looked at her, you could never really tell what color her eyes were. Depended on the light. She had brown hair pulled into a big, long braid down her back, with some scraggly bangs cascading over her forehead. She was the prettiest girl in the village, and she got so much attention because of it that she purposefully tried to look...well, sort of seedy. But to me it never worked.

We did all kinds of fun stuff, growing up. I was always getting into mischief, and she was always right there with me. I got her into more trouble than I intended. I remember a lot of mornings running over to her hut to see if she could play, and seeing her stick her head out the nearest window (no glass back then, so it was just, like, a square hole in the wall), telling me she was grounded for the day because of such-and-such we'd done the previous afternoon. Then one of her parents would come to the door and give me The Look. That way I knew it was time to scram. Her whole family were as close to me as my own, but they were basically over-protective of Iris ever since...well, ever since the first time we'd gone exploring together and I got her into a tangle with a bee's nest. Not my fault. It looked abandoned, seriously.

By the time I was eighteen, with a great little sister worshipping the ground I walked on, I'd matured.

Mostly.

Don't get me wrong, I wasn't actively _looking _for adventure. It sort of followed me around. Or fell on me. Or I ran into it. Or it poked me in the eye.

Whichever you prefer, I was all fun times wherever I went. That's what everyone kept saying.

Iris had matured too. My little sister, Pip, was totally infatuated with her. She was even prettier grown up.

Even though we were best friends, before long (of course) I got butterflies whenever I was around her. I'd see her coming and I'd immediately wonder if my hair was sticking up in random places, which it always was. But then she'd say hi and ask me what I was planning to do for today, and it just kind of faded until I was comfortable as usual around her.

She'd been dropping hints since we'd become teenagers that she was fond of me. I'm not stupid. I just pretended not to notice, because it made me-don't laugh-it made me nervous. I freaked out every time she looked at me with those big, changing eyes and batted her crazy-long eyelashes, or said something merged in context, kind of teasing, like, "Jack's always been this clever," or "The dirt covering your features is a big improvement today, Frost!" or the ever-popular "I love the way you think!" It just felt weird.

I never dropped hints, but I guess I'm guilty of at least flirting. If you can call merciless witty comments flirting. Or maybe I'm just awesome that way.

Pip figured it out _way _before I did. Iris' affections, I mean. She's cute like that, but it's scary how she sometimes knows exactly what I'm thinking. We're just that close.

I remember one day, I was out for a daily walk in the woods with Pip, some of the younger kids, and Iris, and I climbed a tree and hung upside down from it, hooking my legs across the branch and making funny faces at the kids. They loved that stuff.

"Jack, get down from there!" Pip was giggling.

"No, you come up here!" I dared her.

"Nooo, it's too high!" Pip wailed with a grin. "Iris, tell him to come down!"

Iris mimicked my mom's voice. She was great at impressions. "Jackson Overland Frost, you come down from that tree this _minute_ or I'll tell Saint Nicholas you've been _terribly _naughty!"

She even wagged her finger at me.

"Yep, that's me," I said, climbing back onto a crouching position on the branch, slinging my arm over my knee and smirking down at her. "The bad boy. Coal in my tunic, yada yada yada. Haven't you guys ever heard of _fun_?"

"Santa _will _put you on the naughty list, Jack," Pip warned me.

"Aw, come on," I said, straightening up and marching along the branch, balancing. "He'll go easy on me!"

"He's right," Iris said, nudging Pip good-naturedly. "Don't worry. Saint Nick can't resist the Frost charm."

Pip snickered while Iris glanced at me pointedly.

Stuff like that and I just tensed. After a while I just shrugged it off or returned it with a snarky remark and left it at that.

Then when Iris turned eighteen, a full two months after me, I took her ice skating for a present. She'd never done it before and I had to help her not to fall, but it was probably some of the most fun I'd ever had with her.

And then, when we were done skating, heading back to the village, she kissed me on the cheek.

And I was like, _Okay, that's it. _Felt like I was flying for a maximum of two whole incredible minutes. I didn't want to blow it off or pretend I wasn't seriously into her anymore. It was too good.

It was Christmas Eve, if I'm remembering this right, when it all went downhill.

It was winter time, of course, and there were rumors the lake was frozen again. The sun was out, but it was still freezing. Pip had heard I'd taken Iris out ice-skating, just the two of us, and that day she wanted to go with me, for like a brother-sister thing.

So we went, me and Pip.

At first it was a blast. Pip was a natural skater. I showed her the basics and she didn't need any help for the rest of the time.

I did a few spinning tricks for her, and she laughed and said, "You're so good at it, Jack! I wanna skate like that!"

"Ice and I just click, I guess," I said with a grin.

Then I heard a sickening _cr-r-r-rack_, and my heart practically stopped.

Pip had fallen backwards, and she was sitting on the ice now. Jagged lines zig-zagged across the frozen water, all around her.

"Jack..." she began, her voice tight.

"Pip, don't make any sudden moves," I said, screeching to a halt a few feet away from her.

We had reached the very middle of the frozen lake, where the ice was thinnest. We'd be sleeping with the fishes in seconds if I couldn't think fast. I wasn't going to let my baby sister go down if I was with her, still mobile and perfectly able to help. I could get us out of this safe. I just had to keep my cool.

"Take off your skates. Slowly," I ordered in a serious tone.

She did, and my heart pounded harder every time I heard the ice shift beneath her while I took my own skates off, our bare feet losing color against the cold sheet of ground below us.

"Now stand up, Pip, okay? Great, yeah. That's it. Slowly, right? There you go."

I was surprised at how calm I felt, when I was so close to losing her.

I was the big brother. I was eighteen. Time to stop acting like a kid, focused on fun, and try to...

Wait, that's it.

"Jack," Pip said, breaking into my whirling thoughts. "I'm scared."

"Don't be," I told her in a forcibly-cheerful voice. "Don't be scared. We're gonna be fine. We're gonna have a little fun instead."

"No," Pip whimpered. "I can't!"

"Sure you can. Would I trick you?"

"Yes! You always play tricks!"

"Hey, hey, hey, calm down. Just trust me, all right? We'll play a game. How 'bout hopscotch, remember hopscotch?"

She sniffled, nodding.

"This is just like that. You gotta keep your balance, jump really light! See, watch me." I kept my signature smile on my face and hopped forward on one foot, and the ice dented under my weight. "One..."

My sister watched me, shoulders stiffening when she saw the ice crackle.

I pretended it wasn't happening, keeping my eyes locked with hers, my arms hooking in front of me jauntily with each movement toward the more stable ice. "Two..." I hopped again, the ice shifting _again_, and nearly slipped. "W-Woah." I grinned at her sheepishly and chortled.

She let out a giggle too, maybe starting to believe this was all just more fun times with Jack.

"Three!" I took one more big jump and landed on the thicker ice, the ground ceasing to crack underneath me. "There, see? How much fun was that? Your turn."

I crouched, watching her.

She hopped forward, and the ice dented.

"One," I said in the calmest, softest voice I could muster.

She jumped again, on the other foot.

"Two..."

She tensed to hop again, and I saw a shadow dart across the ice underneath us. A fish. If I could _see _the fish, the ice she was about to land on would break immediately under her weight. Pip would drown.

My hand fumbled behind me for my trusty staff, a curved, long branch I took with me on hikes. I kept my eyes on my little sister as I gripped it.

"Three."

Just as her feet left the ground, quick as a wink, I hooked her with the curve at the end of my staff, flinging her halfway across the lake to the edge, where she was safe and could easily step back onto the snowy shore.

She relaxed, knowing we were both going to be fine. She giggled at me, relieved.

I chuckled back, smiling. She was okay! We were going to be okay!

Then her face fell and color drained from it. I felt the world crumble underneath my bare feet and heard a _CRACKSHH_ that made my blood run cold. Ice cold.

"_Jack_!" Pip screamed.

What I remember next was falling. Falling into blue, unbelievably-cold water, my brown hair floating with my bangs covering my eyes partially. My entire body went numb. Shock made my heart burn. I looked up at the light with dimming sight, blackness clouding at the edge of my vision.

Pip was up there. She was going to be fine. _Stay away from the hole, Pip, _I thought groggily, my eyelids getting heavy.

Then they closed, and that was the last time they would as Jackson Overland Frost.

I know what you're thinking. I died. I drowned. How am I telling you this story if I drowned?

The MiM...that's the Man in the Moon, by the way...he changed me. That night, in fact. The place where I'd fallen had already been frozen over again, and a beam of moonlight flashed through the glassy ice, falling over me.

I had no idea who I was, where I was, and what I was supposed to do as I was pulled through the ice, taking a huge gulp of air.

My hair had changed to deep-freeze white, feathery now and glittering with actual frost. My skin was pale, and for me there was no such thing as body heat. I was wearing the same old-timey clothes, my feet still bare.

The Moon told me I my name. Jack Frost. That night, I found my staff...it was the first thing I touched since my transformation. It glowed iridescent blue and ice lined the wood like candy-cane spirals. I could control winter! And all my power was kept in that staff from that point on. Anything I bumped with it, even slightly, was whipped into snow, ice, or a gust of frigid wind.

The Man in the Moon didn't tell me what to do with my powers. He didn't tell me anything over the next 300 years. I figured it out, though, with Tooth's help. (The Tooth Fairy, yeah, don't get me started.)

But back to that night. I tested out my powers for the rest of the evening, then I ended up climbing a tree and spotting lights, warm and friendly, in the distance. Little did I know it was the village I'd grown up in.

I flew (yes, I can fly too, with the wind's help) to the village, laughing the whole way. Hey, I was having a great time so far.

When I landed, two children (Molly and Prentiss, though at the time I didn't recognize them) rushed past me, not smiling or laughing, but rushing into the arms of their mother with what looked like tears in their eyes.

I nodded to a man passing me by. "Hi."

A couple walked past my right side.

"Hello there," I greeted them.

No one answered. No one acknowledged me.

I tried again, holding up a hand to a woman sitting by a fire outside a building. "Good evening, madame."

It took me a while to realize that no one looked happy. No one was even talking much. They all just seemed...depressed. Some of them were even wiping away tears.

'Course, I didn't know back then that it was because of me. I'd died earlier that day.

But after what happened a moment later, I wasn't focused on that at all.

Because when I looked an elderly woman full in the face, standing right in her way, and said, "Excuse me, can you tell me where I am..." she passed right through me.

_Right through me._Right through my body, with a blue flash, like I was made of sky-colored smoke! I caught my breath, gulping in air. What had happened to me? Was I invisible?

"Hello? Hey! Anyone?"

Turned out it was like I wasn't there. No one saw me, no one heard me. No one believed I existed.

I heard voices to my left. It was a relief because it was starting to get real gloomy around that circle of houses.

I reached the house and watched the scene inside from the window, but it was just more sadness.

A gorgeous girl of about eighteen, with brown hair in a long, large braid and brown twine pants with a white, long-sleeved torso was sobbing uncontrollably into her mother's arms. Iris.

"I can't believe it!" she was crying. "He can't be gone! The ice was _safe _the other day, I was _there_!"

"These things happen, Iris," her mom was saying soothingly, but tears stained her face too. "We should have known to test the lake before anyone tried it. At least Madame Frost only lost one child today and not both. We can be thankful for that."

But Iris just kept crying.

Madame Frost? Frost must have been a common name.

"It's not fair!" Iris sobbed. "He was my best friend. What am I gonna do without him? H-He...c-c-can't be gone, he can't be gone!"

I turned away, my eyes downcast. Poor girl. She lost a friend that day. So _that _was why everyone was so blue.

I saw Pip one last time that day. She and my mom (but again, back then I didn't know who they were) were being comforted by several of our friends around the village. Well, people _attempted _to comfort them, but it wasn't really working out.

My mom was holding Pip tight, crying in a soft, heartbroken way that made my stomach turn over. Pip had tears trickling down her cheeks, but she seemed to have gotten all her crying out for the night. Now she was staring at me with dull, glazed eyes like pebbles.

I raised my hand halfway in greeting to her, my fingers uncurling. "Wow. I'm so sorry, kiddo."

Of course she couldn't hear me. She was looking right through me.

I turned around and saw Iris come out of her house, hurrying toward my family.

She ran right through my body. Gave me a huge tingling sensation as the blue engulfed her for a split second and then she emerged a heartbeat later to throw her arms around Pip and my mom, sharing their grief.

I turned to watch them. More specifically Iris. I didn't know it then, but that would be the last time I ever saw her.

She'll always be my biggest what-if.


End file.
